Open Dialogue & a Life of Joy

Open Dialogue & a Life of Joy
by
September 15, 2025

The world feels heavy right now. Political violence seeks to silence voices and creates deeper anger and division in our culture. It should always be condemned. Open dialogue is better. Woodmont has always been committed to talking through the difficult issues, and that is a good thing. Christians are called to model civility, decency, non-violence, and respect in a world of outrage, violence, and anger. Social media has put us in a place where this is more necessary today than ever before.

I have been teaching moral leadership at Vanderbilt University since 2019. My courses tend to focus on topics like happiness, fulfillment, values, civility, emotional intelligence, and the quest for a meaningful life. I want my students to reflect upon what it means to live a moral life that seeks to make a positive difference in the world. How will they make big decisions? Which values matter most? How will they approach the world regardless of their chosen career path? What will sustain them when they face disappointment, tragedy, and hard times?

In his classic book The Happiness Hypothesis, Jonathan Haidt identifies three different theories of human happiness. The first theory is called the “progress principle:” happiness comes from success and acquisition. This principle clearly dominates our consumer culture. We feel that we will be happier if we make more money, buy a nicer car, a bigger house, or more toys. But remember the timeless words of Ecclesiastes: “I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had spent in doing it, and again, all was vanity and a chasing after the wind.” (Ecc 2:11) So many of the material things we chase provide temporary satisfaction.

The second theory is common in Buddhism and other Eastern religions. “Buddha, Epictetus, and many other sages saw the futility of the rat race and urged people to quit. Happiness comes from within and it cannot be found by making the world conform to your desires.” The objective here is to move away from desire, consumption, and attachment because they inevitably lead to suffering. Meditation, contemplation, prayer, and yoga are common ways to achieve this. This theory also recognizes the shallowness and superficiality of our materialistic culture. Many people never go deep.

Ultimately, Haidt concludes that both of these theories are inadequate, so he offers a third and more convincing theory: happiness in life comes from between. “Happiness is not something that you can find, acquire, or achieve directly: you have to get the conditions right and then wait.” Genuine happiness leads to joy. Joy primarily comes from our relationships: “relationships between yourself and others, between yourself and your work, and between yourself and something larger than yourself.” In pursuing happiness, certain obstacles get in our way: anxiety, anger, sadness, grief, loneliness, envy, suffering, illness, and the fear of death. According to Desmond Tutu and the Dalai Lama, we must learn to replace these with perspective, humility, humor, acceptance, forgiveness, gratitude, compassion, and generosity.

While happiness is often dependent on external factors that are outside of our control, joy is what we all seek. According to theologian Stanley Hauerwas, “The most remarkable aspect of learning to live joyfully is that we learn to see the simple and most common aspects of our existence, such as our friends, our spouses, our children, as sheer gifts to which we have no right but who are nonetheless present to us.” Spiritually mature people are able to see the extraordinary in the ordinary, to experience God’s constant presence in all aspects of life. Yale theologian Miroslav Volf says this: “Almost all religious traditions contain a call for us to move beyond self and attend to something larger than us. What often inhibits joy is suffering and trying to achieve a goal that’s not achievable.”

A sense of failure and inadequacy often causes many to give up. Despair sets in. Shame is real. Depression may deepen. More often than not, joy comes from intentionally investing in positive relationships that provide purpose and mutual support in life. This leads to shared meaning throughout the journey, regardless of our destination and accomplishments. At this particular point in history, American culture needs more opportunities for people to seek and experience joy. Joy transcends happiness and is possible no matter what life may bring. College students are still young. They have a lot of life ahead of them. But our world needs more people who exude joy, humility, and a willingness to make a positive impact.

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